Ask the Newlyweds: What To Do After the Wedding?

After months or years of planning, saving money, and worrying about every detail of your big day, the time after your wedding and honeymoon may be anticlimactic. It is not uncommon to be sad that the moment came and passed in a matter of hours. So what can you do to keep your spirits up?

The first thing you need to realize is that you are not alone in your post-wedding depression. Many brides have been there before, and you will find that it will pass. It is all right to feel this way. After planning out the biggest fantasy that you have had since childhood, feeling a loss after the wedding is natural. As such, it is all right to give this feeling a period of reflection. Reminisce about your wedding; look over your photos and guest book, and talk to friends about your wedding day. Perhaps you can make a scrapbook with keepsakes from your wedding planning and wedding day. This will give you a chance to wallow in both the happiness of the day and the sadness that you are now feeling.

After this period of time, refocus your energy on something new. Begin by renewing your interest in the hobbies that you had before the wedding. Perhaps you used to play a sport or collect coins. If you have or are building a home, work on your decorating or gardening skills. Be sure to spend time with your friends and family, so they can support you and talk to you as you are going through these feelings.

Be sure and spend some quality time with your husband doing the things that perhaps you did not have the time to do before the wedding, such as going to the movies, having dinner at a nice restaurant, or biking. Schedule “dates” with each other to keep the romance alive. Perhaps the two of you together could take on a newfound interest; if you are both interested in cooking, for example, join a class together. Since the honeymoon is over, start planning a one-year anniversary trip to an exciting place that neither of you has been to before.

Another idea to keep the spirit of your wedding alive is to have a party every year for your anniversary to get your guests back together and celebrate your big day. Or plan your vow renewal for landmark anniversaries such as one, five, and ten years of marriage.

Weddings are wonderful events, but like time, they pass. You have your future ahead of you; look forward to the years you have with your husband. It is difficult, but focus on the positive and you will be fine!

-- Catherine