How To Handle A "Bride-zilla"

Being a bridesmaid in a wedding can be a very fun experience. However, sometimes the bride can take a turn for the worse and turn into a “bride-zilla”. Yes, it is “her day”. But, just because you agree to do what she says for her wedding, don’t let her take advantage of you and the other ladies. You are a bridesmaid, not a slave. Here are some tips on how to handle a bride-zilla.


Offer to help

· Instead of waiting for her to pick out the John Deere green bridesmaid dress complete with hoop skirt and a very large hat, why don’t you offer to help her shop for bridesmaid dresses. She probably has a style and color in mind, but this is your only way to give her your input before it’s too late.

· Try to offer your help to specific tasks, like helping to assemble favors. This way you dictate what you help with project-wise and time-wise. If you just say, “Call me, I’ll help with anything.” Be ready for it. She may call you twice a day asking your opinion on every detail of the wedding.


What you can push back on

Try to let the bride know upfront your time and monetary availability. Giving her a warning of what you are capable of may help her make reasonable decisions. But, if she ignores it and goes over your head don’t be afraid to address the issues.

· If she chooses a $300 bridesmaid dress and she knows you can’t afford it, don’t be afraid to let her know. Keep in mind, a $300 dress can turn into much more after you add in the cost of alterations, shoes and undergarments.

· Not only does she want you to wear a $300 dress, but she wants you to wear it in the Cayman Islands. If you absolutely cannot afford the travel expenses she expects, it is also important to remind her of your budget again. Let her know she will have to help you with expenses if they are over your limit or you may have to step down from the wedding party.

· Now she would like you to attend monthly meetings to discuss the wedding. That is a pretty large time commitment. This is her wedding, not yours. Helping out every now and then, and being present for wedding events is expected, but anything else is above and beyond. Don’t let her take advantage of your time if you don’t have it to give.


What you can’t push back on

If she has decided on the John Deere green dress even with your help, you will have to live with it and wear it. We all have at least one “memorable” bridesmaid dress in our closets. A fun way to make use of it after the wedding is to have a “bridesmaid dress” party and invite all of your girlfriends to show up in their former hideous gowns. It can make for a very entertaining party.