You were baptized, made first communion, and confirmed, and now you want to get married- in the Catholic Church.
You probably remember the process of making the above sacraments and the classes and you had to complete prior to making them, and the same holds true for marriage. Now, you are preparing for the next sacrament, and probably the most beautiful of the seven sacraments, that of Holy Matrimony. Before you have your mind set on a particular church and date, be sure to consider all of the preparation the Catholic Church requires from an engaged couple who hopes to marry in the Catholic faith.
Prior to meeting with you priest about your wedding, you consider the following:
There are certain times of the year when weddings cannot take place in the Catholic church, such as Lent and Advent, as well as certain Holy Days which are reserved for mass only (Sunday).
Check into your priest’s or church’s marriage requirements. You may need to obtain baptismal certificates, communion certificates, etc.
If your fiancé is not Catholic, you may want to ask the priest for regulations and suggestions for interfaith marriages.
Catholic wedding ceremonies are only performed inside the church. No priest will perform an outdoor Catholic wedding ceremony.
If this is you or your fiancé’s second marriage, be sure that there is an annulment on file.
The Catholic Church also requires that all couples participate in marriage preparation classes and/or meetings. These classes are commonly known as Pre-Cana. You may want to check with your priest about the recommended classes and their schedules.
After you have considered all of the above, call your priest and make an appointment to go over all of the details surrounding the ceremony and marriage. From you meeting, your priest will get an overall idea about your relationship and how you and your fiancé interact. More than likely, your priest will also separate the two of you and ask you to take a compatibility test which will give an assessment of your relationship and possible areas of weakness. Your priest will also give you information on marriage preparation, his expectations for your ceremony, and the requirements and regulations of what the church requires for the ceremony.
Usually following the first meeting, the priest will schedule a second meeting to give the results of the compatibility test. From this he will show the weaker areas and give advice and comments on ways to strengthen the relationship and he may suggest certain portions of the marriage preparation that you as a couple may want to focus on. He will also expect that you attend your marriage preparation before your next visit with him.
Marriage preparation classes, or Pre-Cana is the cornerstone of Catholic wedding preparation and gives couples the opportunity to look at their relationship seriously and focus on areas that may need improvement, as well as build on the stronger aspects of the relationship. There are usually three forms of marriage preparation that parishes offer: The Day for the Engaged, Engaged Encounter, and Evenings for the Engaged. Most priests require that marriage preparation be completed anywhere from 8-6 months before the wedding.
The Day for the Engaged is typically recommended for couples who have very busy, unpredictable lifestyles, for instance, a couple who might work nights or on weekends, or is still in school, etc. This program focuses on all of the aspects of Catholic marriages and their role in the church all in one day.
The Engaged Encounter, on the other hand, is a weekend-long retreat that offers couples the opportunity to dig further into their relationships and interact more with other couples who are also planning a wedding. It also focuses on all of the aspects of Catholic marriages and how to make them stronger.
Evenings for the Engaged, is often done differently from parish to parish, but commonly puts an engaged couple with an older, experienced married couple that can help the engaged couple sort through their relationship and its particular aspects. This program also offers much more tailored, one on one time, and special attention to an individual couple.
After attending your marriage preparation…you are well on your way to getting married in the Catholic Church. From this point on, you should meet with the priest to discuss what you learned, plan the details of the ceremony, and continue to build on a successful relationship.
For more information on planning your Catholic wedding, you can call your local archdiocese.
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