Wednesday, April 23, 2008

How to Pick Non Religious Readings

Whether you're planning a civil ceremony, a religious ceremony, a casual ceremony, or a formal ceremony, you may have the opportunity to include a non religious reading. A reading can add personality and originality to your wedding day, whether it is romantic, serious, humorous, traditional, or obscure. Here are some tips for choosing a reading that adds just the right touch to your ceremony.

Before You Begin

Before choosing the reading that you want to have for your ceremony, talk with your wedding officiant to make sure a non religious reading is allowed in the ceremony. Some officiants may prefer not to deviate from a specific ceremony order. Others may have suggestions of readings that were particularly nice in previous weddings. Once the officiant agrees, you can begin your search.

Starting Places

Make a list of all the possible readings you would like to have. Decide which genre you would prefer, and start reading, keeping in mind your relationship with your future spouse. The reading you choose doesn't have to be specifically about love; it can be about family, home, the place where you met, or anything else significant to your relationship.

Prose: Are there any books that have a particular meaning to your relationship? Does either of you have a favorite author who may have written something appropriate? Were there any books that were important to either of you when you were children? Skim through these looking for paragraphs that would be appropriate for a wedding. With prose, the main thing to consider is whether or not the excerpt will stand on its own. If guests will need to know a lot of background detail in order to make sense of the reading, then the excerpt may not be the best choice. Also try to keep the excerpt short. Any time you're tempted to add "just another paragraph," picture someone standing up at your wedding and reading a chapter of War and Peace.

Poetry: If you like a particular poet, or if you already own some poetry chapbooks, start there. If not, either search your local library for an anthology, or look online for some poetry websites. When choosing a poem, think about how easy it will be to understand by the first-time listener. Some poems are beautiful, but have dense imagery that's hard to understand right away. If you think it would take a literature class an hour to interpret the poem, it may be one to avoid.

Other: You can also consider readings from popular culture, such as song lyrics, or quotes from movies or television. When choosing song lyrics, make that they translate well to the spoken word. You may also want to avoid repeating the refrain between the verses. When you consider a quote from a movie or from television, use the same principles as with prose excerpts: make sure the quote will stand on its own.


Making Decisions

With your future spouse, start narrowing down your choices.

- Try reading the selections aloud to see how they will sound, and to see how easy they will be for the reader to read. The last thing you want is for your reader to feel like he or she is saying "Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers" five times quickly in front of an audience.

- Test your favorites by reading them to a friend or family member. That person can let you know if the choices make sense and are easy to understand.

- Before finalizing your decision, talk to your officiant again. He or she will let you know whether or not the reading you have chosen is appropriate.


Some Examples


- Shakespeare's "Sonnet CXVI" ("Let me not to the marriage of true minds admit impediments...")

- Elizabeth Barrett Brownings's Sonnet XLIII from "Sonnets from the Portuguese" ("How do I love thee? Let me count the ways...")

- Emily Dickenson's epigram for Part Three of her Complete Poems ("It's All I Have to Bring To-day...")

- Charlotte Brontë's Jane Eyre

- Antoine de Saint-Exupéry's The Little Prince

- William Goldman's "The Princess Bride"

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