Monday, April 21, 2008

Who should you invite from work?

Choosing the co-workers you should invite to your wedding can be a very difficult decision-making process. Guests from work are usually the least important on your guest list as it is. Essentially, they are the guests that make or break your budget. So, how do you decide who stays and who goes?





The major questions


· Do I invite my boss? If you (or your fiancĂ©) have been an employee for a while you may want to consider inviting your manager(s). Remember that they are the people approving all of the vacation days for your honeymoon! However, if you dislike your managers or do not think that they would show, you could at least send an invitation. This way, the decision is left up to them.


· What about the “domino” effect? If you invite Linda, you have to invite John. If you invite John, you have to invite Mary, and so on. This could turn out to be a lot of people, especially if you allow them each to bring guests. Try to find a “rule” that allows a good breaking point. For example, you see Linda and John outside of work, but you only see Mary at work and work-related events. Invite Linda and John, and leave Mary off of your list.


· Do I invite my important clients? If you are a sales person, generally your clients know you on some sort of personal level. But, again, unless you socialize with clients regularly, don’t feel obligated to invite them, even if he/she is your top client. It is your wedding day, not time to make your sales quota for the month!





Make a rule to help you decide


As with the domino effect example, try making up a rule for co-workers that will help decide who is and who isn’t invited. For example:


· Only invite the people you report directly to at work. Most people only report to one or two people, which will not hurt your budget.


· Only invite people in your department. This makes your guest list a little larger, but if your department is small, it makes for a good cut-off point.


· Only invite people you socialize with outside of work, or people who have invited you over to their home. These are probably the people you enjoy spending your free time with, thus they are more than just co-workers, they are friends!





Work Wedding Etiquette


· If you don’t plan on inviting everyone from work, don’t bring up the wedding unless you are asked about it. If you go into major details about your planning, people may start expecting invitations. Keep it vague and thank them for asking.


· What if someone (rudely) asks you if they are invited and they are not? Let them know you appreciate their interest in your big day, but unfortunately, you are having a small family wedding. (Make sure not to let it spill later on that you are having 250 guests! See previous point.)


· Do I have to mail invites or can I pass them out at work? Again, if everyone in class is not invited to your birthday party, don’t hand them out at school. People enjoy getting mail, so send these invitations along with the rest of them. However, if you are inviting everyone, it is fine to pass invitations out or post one on the bulletin board.


· Do I have to let co-workers bring a spouse/guest? Unless you know their spouses on a social basis, there is no need to consider inviting more people who you probably won’t even know. Since your co-workers know each other, you could invite them without a guest and seat them at the same table at the reception.





Remember this is YOUR day, and if you prefer not to invite someone that is your decision. Don’t let pressure from others force you to go over your budget for people that you’d rather not have present.

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